


Rattling Bones

by TheThinkingInk



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader is a POC, Slow Burn, Virgin sans, anatomy exploration, bone zone, some smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-12-11
Packaged: 2018-09-01 00:44:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8600419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheThinkingInk/pseuds/TheThinkingInk
Summary: You ask Sans to a date. He makes it difficult, and brings up the question on your knowledge of monster anatomy. You have quite a bit to learn. And apparently, so does he.





	1. Preferably Sometime

“Thanks buddy.” mumbled your neighbor as you held your umbrella precariously over him. The steady whisper of rain fell onto you both, a curtain against the nightlife of the city you moved into a year ago. You smiled, readjusting the grocery bag in your right hand as he fumbled with the keys to the apartment complex you share.

“Oh it’s no trouble,” You propped the umbrella holding arm on his head. “I’m justing watching over you is all.” Truth is, you really did. When the Monsters moved up to the surface and were relocated, you were the first to volunteer with the neighborhood inclusion program. Especially with the laziest bag of bones you met. 

“Meh, nice try.” You helped him and his brother settle into the apartment a few floors above you. You helped Papyrus find a steady job, and even Sans-the little guy with you-was a regular bouncer at Grillby’s and did comedy night there for extra money.

And then the program ended, but you still helped. It was only a few months ago that Sans finally referred to you as a friend when he realized your generosity was genuine. 

But now you wanted more than friendship from the bone-a-fide comedian. 

Much more.

The door finally creaked open, and you clasped shut your umbrella that had bones dotted across it. It was a gift from them both, after the one time you were running back and forth to bring them citizenship papers in the rain. It was during the time that being a monster wasn’t the best when communicating with humans. You were so enthusiastic about finally getting the papers signed that you ran panting to their door, smiling and dripping wet with the forms in a ziplock bag.

You got sick, and Papyrus made you chicken noodle soup. Sans left a note with the umbrella next to the bowl after he knocked.

Be safe and try to stay dry. You’re less cute when your sick. -Sans

It was thoughtful, and that’s when you decided to see if your butterfly-like feeling when you saw him was going to be reciprocated. Hence going with him to the grocery store in the rain. 

This is it. You’re gonna ask him.

You began to go up the stairs. “…ah..”

Or he’ll ask you.

Sans looked up and your voice died out. “Hm? Sorry I’m really tired, you said something.” He stated. 

“I did, didn’t I? Um, yes I was going to say that..well.” You coughed and furrowed your brow. You were in front of your apartment already. He didn’t move from your side. All signs of fatigue gone as his eyes widened just a tad more, expectant. 

“Hey, um, if you ever want to try something else than Papyrus’s food you can come over.” You stared at the ground. It had lovely carpet. 

“Oh?”

“Like this Friday, preferably around eight?” You can feel his eyes digging into you and you suddenly was very grateful for how your brown bag obscured your face and he was so short.

“Huh, better than Papyrus? That’s a tall order.” You can hear a slight rattling of bones. Laughing. Laughter is fine. You lowered your bag to look at him, smiling.

“An order I will make if you want…I think I can mustard up to his standards.” You gripped your keys tighter. He looked up to the sky in deep thought.

“Hmm, I dunno. I may be busy on Friday. But I’ll pop in if I can.”

“When are you busy?” You blurted. “I-I mean you only work on the weekends!” 

“Usually, but tibia honest I don’t have a concrete schedule.” He shrugged his shoulders, his telltale grin widening at your scrunched nose. He loved the small digs at you, or at least he liked making you bristle from time to time. It was an odd game, probably because normally you are pretty well composed, helpful and witty. Toriel, Papyrus, and Frisk loved that about you when you aided them.

Not this bag of bones.

“But I can promise that sometime, this week, I’ll be there.” And he got a kick out of making you slightly catty ever since you two met. 

“That’s not helpful Sans,” a pout was developing. “You don’t know if I’d be available.”

“You work remotely.” He chuckled. That’s right, you freelance a lot of work from home, only going out when you wanted or needed to. It was one of the many things you had in common with him, you preferred working on your terms. “You’re usually home anyways.”

“What if I’m not ready?” you quipped.

“What would you need to be ready for?” You sputtered and hugged the bag slightly tighter. His smile was practically ear to ear now as you felt a heat peak at your ears as if they were burning.

“Fine then. See you.” You muttered. Was a simple clear answer too much? Was he obfuscating stupidity? Or did he know, but wanted to keep you on your toes? “Sometime, preferably Friday. Preferably eight o’ clock.”

“Preferably see ya.” He knocked on his door, winking at you. “Have a gouda night with your spaghetti.”

You smiled, briefly before you turned to your door and went into your simple apartment. It was a date. Maybe, sometime this week. Could be anytime.

You’ll be ready.


	2. Netflix and Chilling.....what's that?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you Netflix and chill with Sans when he comes over. heh.

 

  
The problem that Sans created with his whole ‘sometime this week’ ploy was that it could’ve been anytime. And that meant that you were nervous.

You fiddled with your hair a bit, unsure as you stood in front of your wardrobe. Skinny jeans and a cute top? You had one in mind that would be cute, but what if you saw him later this week? You can’t wear the same outfit twice. Okay how about a slouchy top over leggings for today? Yeah, today’s a lazy day anyhow.

Every now and then you glanced at your door, expecting for him to knock on it like he would sometimes and look at you with that lopsided grin. He claimed you achieved the dream: so many freelance jobs that you can have days to nap and relax. You never laughed so hard. Save for Monday, you don’t really relax.

You’ll try yoga today to get into said relaxation mode. Rolling out your mat, you placed your bare feet on the edge and stretched your body upright, and did a right-leg lunge. You have explained time and time again that it wasn’t easy doing freelance.

Freelance social working, tutor, and server means that at any given time you’re called in. And the only guarantee of freedom you have is today and Friday, which you requested off from Grillby. Monday’s are the off days, Tuesday is tutoring with Toriel and talking to some of the monster parents about their job hunting and employment, Wednesday is production assistant with Mettaton, Thursdays you review and analyze Undyne’s training at the police precinct, and the weekend is going to host or wait at Grillby’s.

Bringing your hands up, you bent over and placed them onto the mat to crab walk yourself into a plank. You take a deep breath in and held the pose.

But what if he came today? You snap your head to the door as you heard Papyrus leave his apartment, making a grand announcement to his brother about his departure. You bite your lip from giggling as he barreled down the rickety stairs. Stretching into a few other poses you stood up and yawned.You snuggled up on the couch with a blanket, thinking about the next move as you flicked through some show recommendations.

Sans wouldn’t come the next day, you think. Unless he really wanted to surprise you. But then again, he might. He’s home right now most likely, nothing would stop him from coming over to make good on that date. You can both make jokes and cook lunch. And then Friday evening’s all yours. But that wouldn’t go according to plan.

You phone buzzed and you leaned over to glimpse the notification on the table. A message, from Sans.

_Hey, you free?-Bonafide Comedian_

You sat up quickly and looked back to the door. No….no he wouldn’t. You texted back slowly.

_Yep, it’s an off day. Netflix and chilling by myself lol._

_Nice, want me to join you?-Bonafide Comedian_

You breathed out, calming yourself down. Join you? As in…..well, that’s what a few dates would lead to but would Sans be the type of person to skip to that? Your phone beeped again.

_BTW, this doesn’t count as a date-Bonafide Comedian_

Oh. You breathed out a sigh of relief, but scratched your head. But then why was he coming over? A knock came to your door. You yelped, clutching the phone. Where was your bravado from last night?

Well, that was yesterday you, and yesterday you had more balls. You straighten yourself up and walked to the door. This was another ploy, you’re sure of it. He wanted to through you off balance. You cracked the door open a bit, smiling as you sagged yourself against the door frame. “Hey.”

“Heya.” He smiled up at you. If this was indeed a ploy to test you, then you’ll meet him head on. You opened up the door for him to enter.

“How’s Papyrus?” you watched as he looked around your place, before settling into the couch.  
He seemed so casual to just lay there, as if he was meant to merge for all time.

Sans chuckled, trying to hold his composure as something came to him. “Oh, he’s beside himself. The guy who own’s the pizzeria loves Paps.” You sat next to him and draped an arm over the cushion between you two letting your fingers brush the back of his skull. You scooted closer, only seeing the slightest flinch of your skele-buddy at the action.

“Oh?” You asked.

“Yeah, so get this. He decides to redo the slogan and really, really push Papyrus out there.” You can hear his bones rattle slightly, he looked like he was going to wheeze. “So…so heh heh the slogan is now ‘Bone appetite!’” He descended into a deep laugh and you covered your mouth to hide your own.

“Brillant. And Papyrus is ecstatic?”

“No. Not really. But it does give him yet another ‘charismatic’ costume to wear.” his chuckles subsiding, he looked over to you. Running your fingers through your hair you looked at the menu screen and ignored the rising heat to your cheeks.

“Well if he does tire of it, I can try for another place.”

You were both quiet for a while as you decided to pick an anime about figure skating. You hugged a pillow to yourself as Sans watched the characters with a quirked brow.

“Wait….he’s naked.” he looked over to your now enflamed cheeks.

“U-um….yes so he is. I didn’t expect that.” you mumbled. Granted, something about the guy’s silver hair and blue eyes was thrilling to see. “But it IS a hot spring. He would be naked anyway.”

“Eh, why pay to bathe where other people clean themselves.”

“It’s more for relaxing and to….relax….” Your voice died as said man in the anime stood up, giving you and you bone friend a clear view of his rear. You swallowed and grabbed for the remote as another deep chuckle rumbled from Sans. “Okay imma watch this later! Sorry!” He seemed too busy chuckling to care about the TV turning off and you grabbing your pillow.

“So, is this how you Netflix and chill?” he asked.

“Um…” You sighed and let go of your makeshift pillow shield. “No. At least, not um, properly.”

“Since when did you not do things properly?”

Since when did he want to go this fast? Last you checked, Sans didn’t date. At least that’s what Papyrus told you. He didn’t bring anything home save for food or friends. Hence why even asking him was so nerve-wracking. Unless….maybe he kept his sexuality from his own brother? Was Sans aromantic?

“I..Did you want to? I mean…okay I know that’s why you came over but..so soon?” He nodded, and you swallowed your fears. Maybe he was, or maybe this is what he wants from you. But what about you? “Ok.” You gave a sheepish grin and you caressed the back of his skull again, to his surprise.

You carefully crawled over him, your face inches from his. You were a bit unsure of how to kiss a skeleton. Or if he wanted to, maybe he wasn’t the kissing type for this. You pressed your mouth to his forehead first, peppering small kisses until you reached his mouth and lingered there. When you pulled away, his face had a vibrant shade of blue and his eyes were slightly bigger in his sockets.

“Kit-” His voice died out as you went back to his mouth, kissing his lower jaw and humming as you grazed his um, was it a ligament? It’s where his neck would be. He groaned, a slight buck in his hips into yours. You took it as a sign to allow your hand to ghost over his shorts, dipping into them as you touched something that wasn’t any bone you recognized.

He stilled and gripped your shoulders. “O-oh…..” You looked up as his rocking motion ceased entirely and his eyes were diverted. “That.”

“What’s wrong?” you sat up as he turned away, looking at his shorts and straightening it out over….something.

“Nothing kitten, I just missed the memo of what that really meant.”

“What that really….” You felt the color drain from your face. Shit. He was curious. He had no idea what ‘netflix and chill’ meant?! “Oh..oh my god Sans I didn’t-”

“It’s cool,” He was staring hard at the lump in his shorts and it suddenly crumpled down, as if whatever it was disappeared. “I didn’t know that ‘netflix and chill’ was um…well…”

You buried your face into the cushion, face beet red. “Was code word for sex?”

“I’m not as cool as I thought, heh. So…you thought I wanted…” He trailed off, and you felt him pat your head. “Hey! It’s fine.” His hands grabbed your shoulders to lift you up to his eyes. He was smiling again, still blushing.

“Is it? I almost….” Your eyes wandered down to that spot on his shorts, still wondering. “Christ I feel like a pervert. Fuck my life.”

“Not yet.” He laughed. You wanted to bury yourself into the couch.

“W-well, at least now you know what that means.” you fiddled with the bottom of you shirt. “So this was a great lesson for you.” Glancing at him, he nodded before looking all over your apartment.

“Yeah, a teaching moment.” he swung onto his legs to stand. “I’m gonna to take a recess for a while.”

“Are we still good on that date?” you sat up straighter. He rubbed his skull slowly and kicked at the carpet, eyeing the door.

“Maybe, yeah.”

“Sans, it doesn’t have to end like that if you don’t want to.” you knelt down to be at eye level with him. It wasn’t meant to demean him, but you wanted to look him in the eye. “We can go on quite a few dates, see how things go?”

He rubbed the back of his head, laughing half-heartedly. “Where this will go? Do you really…” Sighing, he looked into your eyes. “You really think this would go anywhere?”

Cocking your head to the side, you smirked at the thought in your head about that lump you saw in his shorts. You hope so. “Yes.”

“Kitten, you gotta take me out on the date first before your mind goes dirty.” You rolled your eyes at his jab.

“You gotta catch up with sex lingo before you get into another mishap.” sticking your tongue out as you held the door open, you relished in his blue blush spreading over his cheeks. “Bye Sans.”

“Bye kitten.” He waved you off as you closed the door.

As soon as you locked it you bolted for your phone and called the one person you can think of to help you. Admittedly, you weren’t too calm as they picked up the phone.

“Hello-”

  
“Oh my god I’m sorry but this is super important I think I almost molested someone and I dunno who else to ask because I don’t think his brother would tell me and-”

“Whoa whoa, slow down darling. What’s the trouble?”

“Um…can you actually fuck a skeleton?”  

After a deep, dramatic gasp the person didn’t miss a beat. “Town Square. Coffee date. Now.”

“W-wait!” The lifeline almost hung up. “Are you gonna tell me if you can? Or how to?”

There was a light, cheerful laugh as your confidant replied.

“Oh _yes_.”


End file.
